Archive for the ‘sexuality’ Category

While there are many thoughtful academic and journalistic works on what defines and creates a culture of oppression, patriarchy and rape, I offer here subtle energy realizations through awakening and embodied living. These aren’t offered for analysis and dis/agreement, but for checking by direct seeing. If you are able, do set aside intellectual and philosophical arguments, and simply look. Look and see, and you’ll know what is meant when it is said that the world doesn’t exist outside of us. Or, that it is manifested as a reflection / projection of our identity of separateness and the conditioning it carries!

(Also, it would be easy to read this and think I am advocating some brand of puritanism or offering a critique and shaming of sex, materialism and consumerism. Quite the contrary, I am speaking of a total and unconditional (loving!) allowing of all the conditioning so that it can be wholly seen, accepted, embraced and integrated… dissolved. And I am speaking of the realization that until it is integrated — brought into integrity as whole — it continues to project the “reality” we collectively experience… no matter who it is that “personally” acts out the “worst.”)



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True celibacy is the state of spontaneous cessation (dissolution, not repression) of all sexual urge or impulse or need arising in the body or mind, without (mandating) exclusion of physical union. This means that all conditioning, reactivity, emotional uprising and attachment have dissolved at the level of physical body. The “abstinence” in the celibate is of these things; it has nothing to do whatsoever with whether actual physical union is experienced or not.

Actually, to the contrary, it is the true celibate who can cease sex and begin lovemaking, the act of sacred physical union from the Heart center!! Lovemaking happens when the physical act transcends all need and is purely an inspired giving-receiving of Love in the physical. (more…)

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I have never before articulated this explicitly, but now feels like a good time. Perhaps it will assist some who wish for clarity and calm within.

When I created with women of color (including myself) for several years in Seattle’s Yoni ki Baat (YKB) project (inspired by Eve Ensler’s Vagina Monologues), my intention remained the same as it has been for any endeavor: Lift the frequency of human spirit (toward its natural return Home).

Shame is the emotion with the lowest frequency of vibration in the human energy field. It is next only to the frequency of death (i.e. the frequency at which the human body vibrates at the time of death). So, shame = death, and illuminating and embracing shame sparks life. One area in which the dense energy of shame is stuck and stored in the physical human body, is the womb (and related generally, to the subject of sexuality and its perversion). So, if the womb can lift itself out of the energy of shame, it can birth (itself and others) anew! By rejuvenating itself alone to a state of wholeness, it births humanity anew (starting with the Self), both physically and spiritually.

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Sometime early last year it hit me. Duh! That’s what the term “gentleman” really means (or ought to, anyway)! No, no, not the idea that finally, the savage, brawny creature becomes cultured and cultivated, reigning in his natural instinct for rough-and-tumble and emerging the gentleman. And no, neither do I mean that the gentleman is someone who “is in touch with his feminine side.” Rather, I actually mean that gentleness is at the very core of every man. It is the true nature and true power of the masculine essence! (**Please see P.S. for a note on gender.)

I came to understand this not intellectually, but experientially, inspired by the profound influence of a singularly special man in my life. My phrase (and poem below) for the experience is Like Water to Earth — Water, the most powerful sculpting agent of Earth, all the while doing it with a softening, molding, cleansing, nourishing and life-giving power. Once I saw this, though, it somehow extended to become my all-encompassing view and understanding of all the wonderful men I have (had) in my life — as friends, partners, (partners of friends), brother- or father- or grandfather-figures, and in recent years, also several “son-figures.” (It seems that I am surrounded by and inevitably close to mothers with boys!) And also through the many incredible men who have contributed to the heArt work in publishing Courageous Creativity for over 4 years now — men who transform the world every single day with the extraordinary power of gentleness. (I can’t help giving a special shout out to Nipun Mehta!) Writing this post quickly in the heels of Father’s Day, I have to mention noticing (through social media) that many women appear to be experiencing and acknowledging this quality in the fathers of their children regardless of whether it “worked out” between them or not, (or are/were fortunate to experience it in their own fathers, like I too am now). One particularly beautiful phrase that stuck with me was about the power of fathering with “gentle strength and tender affection.” (more…)

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